News Day Laura

I blog, post pictures, review movies, share fun youtube videos, report the news of the day and more. The point is to entertain you. I do this for you, not me.

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Have you seen Mega-shark vs. Giant Octopus?

If you haven’t, you should! 

Fun for the Day

OMG! - Sports Illustrated’s ‘Best Beards in Sports History’ HERE HERE HERE HERE!

This is something that you and I should read so that we can meet up during the apocalypse - Article - best places in the US to survive the apocalypse HERE - WE ARE SO BUILDING A SILO HOME!

Night Sky Visibility

  • Daily Mail - British fisherman grapples with ferocious ‘giant piranha’… which has been known to eat CROCODILES HERE Daily Mail
  • America in Color 1939-1943 HERE
  • 10 famous ghost pictures and their story HERE

Dance off! Stephen Colbert vs. John Stewart vs. Conan O’Brien DANCE OFF

K enjoy for now - I’m out for a bit.


Fuck it I’m drinking tonight

As I was driving back to the office, I was just thinking about what an unhealthy piece of shit I am: I smoke, I drink too much, I eat like shit and don’t excersize (I can’t spell excersize & I don’t care). So I was thinking about all the different ways I can die, and how I will most likely have a heart attack one day if I don’t slow down with my bad habits - but then I fucking saw this - And it made me and my unhealthy ass feel OK

From DListed today:

Jean-Claude Van Damme Had A Heart Attack

DListed: Contrary to what we learned in science class, Jean-Claude Van Damme’sheart is not an unstoppable organ made of cyborg parts and bullets covered in the blood of his enemies. Sadly, Jean-Claude’s heart karate kicked itself and he suffered a minor heart attack while working on the set of his new movie in New Orleans.

The NYDN reports that filming on the movie has been put on pause while Jean-Claude’s heart gets back into ass kicking condition. JC was briefly hospitalized in New Orleans before going back to Belgium to fully recover. His rep says that he’s doing okay.

I don’t feel better because JCVD had a heart attack - it’s that this dude prolly takes uber good care of himself (sans steroids), eats well, excersizes, doesn’t smoke AND STILL had a heart attack. So fuck it, I’m drinking tonight. Internal battle won on the side of evil self justification. However, Mr. Vandamn, we do wish you well!

Can someone tell me how tumblr works? How do I get followers? 

Sorry I’m Late

I forgot 2 things today: First, that I had to drive my boss all over LI this morning, and second, my drivers cap. I had to sit in my car for an hour and a half while he was in a meeting in the middle of the ghetto, parked in front of a “Wings and Things” I kept the car running with the doors locked in case I had to make a break for it. So I apologize for being late, but it’s a slow news day anyway.

It’s 1:24pm and I am already having my daily internal battle as to whether or not I should drink tonight or not. I was a good girl last night… but mmm beer…

I want these lil guys they are super cute! 

I woke up in a cold sweat this morning because I had a nightmare I was back in High School and taking the SAT’s anymore. My teacher was a tranny, which didn’t bother me - it was that I was BACK in High School and surrounded by everyone there. Gah nightmares. 

I Hate Planning Board

‎[Sad face, walks out the front door with her head down dragging her jacket behind her through the leaves] Time to go to a planning board meeting for work. PRAY it goes fast, PLEASE! - PLEASE! God I hate Tuesday night meetings!

I’m going to try to plugin during the meeting if I can find an outlet. Otherwise I will be speed needlepointing, grinding my teeth because not only do I HATE sitting through these meetings, it’s also a sober night!

We are on Tumblr!

If you are on tumblr, add me - the blog will be the same there on a regular basis so we can be friends there too! Add me! I only have 2 followers - It’s really cold and lonely there. Won’t you keep me company? Bring a blanket, please.

BUT DO NOT FEAR! Blogger will still always be my home so, I’m not going anywhere. I post from here and it burns to Tumblr so, stay put and stay puft!


If you really care…

  • No wonder JWoww is such a tough girl… she was the fat kid in school. Here’s the Jersey Shore cast as kids from Radar Online . And there’s no way I can be meaner than South Park, but Snooki looks like a Mexican landscaper, even in pre-school.

  • Randy and Evi Quaid face arrest warrants—again!—for skipping a court appearance yesterday. The actor and his wife were due at the hearing to face felony vandalism charges from an arrest last month AOL
  • Tom Bosley, a character actor who will forever be revered as Howard Cunningham in the hit sitcom ‘Happy Days,’ died on Tuesday at his home on Palm Springs, his family has told TMZ. According to the report, Bosley had been battling a staph infection. He was 83 Pop Eater
  • Uma Thurman got either antiqued by one of the Jackass guys, kissed by a clown or someone did a lil too much blow WWTDD
  • Mel Gibson to stage Tom Cruise-like-comeback with role in The Hangover 2 Yahoo!

Rent is too damn high…

From The Huffington Post

While many might have expected fireworks at Monday night’s New York Gubernatorial debate featuring a clash between Carl Paladino and Andrew Cuomo, much of the real intensity came from the forum’s long-shot fringe candidates, and perhaps primarily from Jimmy McMillan, candidate of “The Rent Is Too Damn High” Party.

In the clip below, nicely packaged by the Daily Beast, McMillan can be heard dropping a few of his signature tag-lines, much to the amusement of the audience, the moderators and even Democratic candidate Andrew Cuomo.

This guy is awesome because: 

A.) He’s a Karate Expert

B.) That beard fucking owns

C.) Did he say he’ll marry a shoe?

D.) He can hear children’s stomach’s growling from where he is!? That’s super human hearing!

D.) He’s right - the rent IS too god damn high

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Join his cause HERE - NO GO THERE RIGHT NOW! OMGOMG OMGOMOGMO! He has his own hip hop song!?? Get out of here! 

I’m so confused

I’m pretty cranky today, so I’m not going to write too much at least right now cuz I am in a murderous mood.

So I just imported my blogger into tumblr, and I just don’t get it. Then I got sucked into using a burn feed and an RSS - I don’t even know what that shit means. And apparently there’s a way for whatever I post on Blogger to go directly to tumblr, but I can’t figure this shit out. What the fuck is a blogger chicklet? This blog DIY shit is a bitch.

I”m cranky because it’s Tuesday which means I have to go to a planning board meeting tonight for work and something tells me I’m going to be trapped in god damn city hall from 8pm-12am. Those meetings are never ending. It’s also pretty shitty out so that doesn’t help the mood either. Not like I have a window in my office anyway.  Sun could be shining and I wouldn’t know cuz I work in a basement. G-H-E-T-T-O

Please be patient

I’m trying to set up a tumblr page but having trouble importing this blog… grrrrr. That’s why I haven’t posted as much as I usually do in the past 18 hours. I apologize!


Impromptu Movie Review: Enter the Void

I got home from work at 6pm and JP was watching some movie called “Enter the void” - this was an hour and a half ago. Justin said that the movie was freaking him out because it’s “really fucked up, like I felt like I was tripping.” Anyway, it’s an over the top, psychedelic like acid trip about some dead kid that returns as a ghost to watch over his sister but then spends 3 quarters of the movie floating around looking for something to be reincarnated as. I think I need help writing this up… I don’t even know how to explain it… maybe the trailer will help:

Anyway the entire movie is bright flashing lights, strange sideways and out-of-focus-back-in-focus camera angles, loud thumping tones for music and vagina’s that emit glowing lights. Although I must say, that even though the entire movie culminated in a literal jizz shot… and when I say that I mean that LITERALLY - we thought it was a pretty good movie. However I don’t think I would’ve been as interested if I didn’t figure out right away that Lucy (Paz de la Huerta) from Boardwalk Empire, was the main character.
And we get to see her in all her scrumptious-ness naked again… However I could have done without the abortion scene.  If you are into philosophy or you smoke A LOT of weed I recommend this movie. If you are epileptic or have a history of stroke, stay away ~ Non stop flashing lights ~